State-Dependent Memories

As it is said,
“Today, if you hear his voice,
do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.”
-Hebrews 3:15

A few days ago, I revisited an old tea cafe, where I used to go, when my heart was all but bled out. It’s been nearly a year since the storms have subsided, and I feel like a different man.

It brings back nostalgia. In those days, hearts were hardened; not only the hearts of those I pleaded with,
but my own.

Coming back to the place that holds such memories, I remember why God warns us to OPEN our hearts TODAY. In the past, in the ‘rebellion’, hearts were hardened and prices were paid. So, as long as it is called today, pray to God for help as you pierce open your heart and let truth shine in.

Still, I’m sad and hollowed out. Even with knowing all this, feelings are feelings and I am honest with them.

Today’s sermon reminded me that Christ himself was pierced with sorrow. People REJECTED Jesus. And the reasons that people reject God is the same today. So it shouldn’t surprise me at all. Not everyone I meet will be on the same page.

Today, my close friend will be meeting with my rosy thorn.
He offered to me if I can meet with her, but I declined.

No more state-dependent memories. At least for now.

“Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God.”
-Psalm 42:11


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