Back at SD.
I’ve been back at sweet home San Diego since Saturday and I have not been able to sit down and rest since then…
It is now 12:26 AM and I finally found the time to sit down and journal quietly. [albeit, my roommate is sleeping; he’s sleeping quite early tonight, since 1st day of class is tomorrow. Maybe it be best for me to continue this outside, in the living room. *does so*]
So.. what has happened so far? I’m going to list these out as fast as i can… or slow as i can? [probably’s going to sound weird. oh well ;]
- Back at apartment, after driving Andrew Lin back to SD.
- Helped Tim Nieh & Austin Cheng move their stuff back to apartment; they finally came down to SD after this break. Misses norcal very much. Me too :3
- Watched Jeffrey Yeh play the game that is the culmination of my childhood days of a gamer, Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots.
- Had dinner & hung out at my apartment, playing Josh’s Jengas, complete with questions per brick. Many laughs were to be had. ^^
- Church. Pastor John continued John 4 & I learned some insightful things, regarding our walk with Christ. I will definitely elaborate later in detail, but main gist is:
- There is joy in evangelism.
- There can be nourishment in sharing your faith.
- Sharing one’s faith can instigate spiritual growth and vigor [it can test and flex spiritual muscles]
- There is joy in doing God’s will, to the point of completion.
- Ate lunch at Souplantation and had fun catching up with LBC ppl.
- Saw Jeffo play MGS4 AGAIN. Played it myself, got bored, went in alert mode & killed mounds of soldiers. 🙂 Maybe i kinda enjoy pretend-killing virtual baddies in video games 😉
- Cleaning crew. Helped clean churches and played with people afterwards.
- Dinner was Micky D’s. And then played at Sarah C’s place and had more of Josh’s awesome Jenga’s set along with delish almond jello [compliments of Jeff Yeh ;]
In the last 2 days, the amount of smiles and laughs more than compensates the shortage of happy feelings during break.
For me, these happy feelings were reminders to me that being with the presence of genuine fellowship can be uplifting, especially during dry times. [obviously, I should NOT rely & lean heavily on fellowship as my sole source of support and sustenance. It is God who supplies and sustains such things; lean on Him]
However, I was no longer being drained by constant spiritual pressure that comes with being surrounded by “bad company”. I was no longer having my heart being torn and wrenched by the divisive talks from those who genuinely hate God.
Instead, I’m surrounded by the presence of those who are rejoicing and being content in Him!
For me, to see genuine heartfelt love for God is a blessing.
Instead of being surrounded at DB by those spiritually dead (or dying, leaving churches & leading immorality), in a sly twist, I am being surrounded by older, stronger soldiers of the faith, being built up & loved on, as my spiritually bleeding wounds are being mended at SD. [it’s so funny; roles are reversed in this twist of ironic comparison]
Why do I love being at SD?
It’s because of what God blessed me and allowed me to experience so much from all this. It’s no wonder that I’m soo happy sometimes, to just be here, and no longer bleed with enemies.
But to me, it’s only a mere taste of what heaven would be like… of what life after death would feel like.
And if fellowshipping with people is this good…
how about with our LORD, our God?
To have faith revealed to sight.. & see God face to face?
That was one of the questions in Joshua Liu’s Jenga sets
“What would you say to God when you see Him face to face?”
If I were to see God.. face to face…
I’d fall on my knees, tear-stricken,
that he saved me from
Because the home I left [from DB] reminds me of my past self, and it’s wearisome to bear the burden of the past along with vampires draining away my vigor.. tempting me the same things that I’ve used to long for before.. reminding and accusing me of my failures (and its consequences)… waving tokens of my past sins…
And the home I found [at SD] reminds me of my new self, of how I am made to be different (even my friend groups are vastly different from the ppl at DB) and renewed in Christ’s blood.
It’s something I’m so thankful of, that I’m changed forever
that I can never
PS: I’m at Journal 3, out of 9 journals and 2 sheets. It’s crazy; I’m at the part where i’m about to end my 1st year, after many significant changes. It’s crazy! 😀
PPS: oh man. this is so late. i’m so screwed for my 1st day of class; i’ll have to regiment how i’m going to be updating this…